For those that read ‘Background’ you’ll be across the history which was a cross between Terry Gilliam’s Brazil, and the Sloth DMV scene in Zootopia! Below is a summary of some of the activities required just to get ready for demolition ….
#1 – Electrical Pit. Quite common, but the new dwelling doesn’t accommodate overhead power lines, so we need an electrical pit, which I need to organise. Quite an ordeal finding the people, who find the people, to then fill out an application to qualify to get another form to apply for ‘Pole to Pit’ connection. Would’ve been easier to join the Stonecutters Club! Our supply was from a pole on the other side of the road. $$.
#2 – Arbol de la Muerte. For those who’ve not read ‘Background’ – this is, in fact, not a Manchineel but rather a large Liquidambar on the front corner of the property right next to the driveway. Somehow ‘Tree of Death’ seems more apt One sizeable branch, plus a couple more, needed to be cut/pruned back as they impeded the builder’s access to the site and new roof line. This was specifically permitted under the TPP measures (extract below). Lucky us. More tree protection measures below, and more to come during the site scrape stage. Cha-ching.
#3 – Water Meter. Volume builders’ plumbing contractors typically just use a trenching machine from the new house to the water meter. Because of the aforementioned TPP, this was prohibited as the meter was literally next to the base of the tree. Therefore, we were required to move the water meter to the other side of the property, and obviously it had to be hand dug. A two part job – the SE Water folk do their bit capping & tapping the mains (luckily the water main runs on our side of the street) & the plumber needs to do the tap portion on the property. Thought I would’ve come back during the afternoon to find them cursing me & the tree, and they might have been cursing, but they were done & gone before I got back.
#4 – Storm water. Our existing storm water outlet was, well, non-existent. A new one was required. Like the water meter above, this needed to be done on the other side of the property to avoid the tree roots. The builder’s plumbers will later hook up the ‘charged’ storm water system to this point.
#5 – Raising & moving wires. Another problem was that our neighbour’s wires passed (from the pole across the road) low over our driveway entrance to our neighbour’s house. Builder requires minimum 4m clearance. Luckily, their electrical wires were high enough but the telephone & NBN were too low. Again, my responsibility to organise. Luckily 2 wires were redundant (which I would organise to remove), leaving just their NBN. Initial suggestion from their service provider & estimate was to go underground at $15k cost! After endless ringing around (no thanks to the retail telco provider), managed to get hold of the appropriate engineer. Quickly found an overhead solution that worked for my neighbour, engineer & me – luckily at a fraction of the cost.
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With #1 to #5 completed, we got the go-ahead from the building co-ordinator to schedule in demolition. Demolition booked for 3rd week of November. Booked a removalist for start of November. With that done, two final actions …
#6 – Abolishment of Services. Everything except water needs to be abolished – this meant Electricity, Telephony/Cable/NBN, Gas & Sewage capped:
- Thought sewage would be the hardest but that was easiest but certainly not the cheapest. Had to go down 2m+, so they needed a digger and because of the soft sand (which kept caving in) needed to broaden the hole. You know the ‘ol triangle of quality vs time vs money – I chose time One phonecall on a Wednesday afternoon. By that Saturday they came out, capped the sewage, and marked the spot for the builder.
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Electricity & Gas should be easy since both were with the same provider & I started the process the 3 obligatory months before but you might as well be dealing with two different companies:
- Electricity was actually ok, and eventually came on the 3rd try.
- Gas was horrendous thanks to the retailer’s most exasperatingly illogical booking process which they chose not to inform me about when I had rung them 3 months earlier. They couldn’t guarantee they’d be able to abolish within their own timeframe, so I had to try push out demolition & the pool works by a week. Luckily, both could accommodate this. Anyway, gas finally got abolished, but within 2 hours of abolishment, someone stole our old instant hotwater system … amazing coincidence. Not! Only comfort for me was that it was over 10 yrs old, and intermittently would get scoldingly hot, or not warm up. To the w@nker that stole it – I hope you burnt your @rse!!
- Telephony was also a challenge. No great surprise as it was the same retailer from #5 (you know who ” …. Regrets”). Despite giving assurances they’d take care of all of the wires, that proved to be a lie when after 3 missed appointments & follow ups, they cut only 1 wire. It was then revealed that they do not touch NBN (but they could give me a number … gee thanks). Nor do they touch the old Telstra fixed line despite charging us a line rental fee for 10 years as a customer (would not even make a phone call on my behalf or even provide a number). NBN was quick once I spoke to them. Spoke to Telstra who recommended I just get an ACMA technician do it in less time & money. One phone call, 2 days & $110 and it was done with 2 days to spare. Paid him also to cut my neighbour’s redundant telephone wires (see #5).
#7 Temporary Fencing. Was told I needed to organise temporary fencing for the duration of the build. Informed the builder that on one neighbour’s side the fence was in terrible condition – literally falling down along virtually the whole length. Builder recommended not installing a new fence until after handover because of the likelihood of the fence getting damaged & smeared with paint & concrete during the build. Agreed & so did the neighbour. Quite straight forward. Within 5 minutes booked them for the completion of the demolition until handover some 12 months later.
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All boxes ticked. þ Just needed to move out & we were ready for demolition. Through some freak timing the better half got sent on a business trip to NZ the day of the move, leaving me with a 80% packed house, 2 kids & the removalists. I still recall the departing instructions of “Before I leave … Don’t lose the kids. You decide where everything goes but make sure that is exactly where I want it. Ok, I’m off!”. … Well, I didn’t lose the kids
Couldn’t believe it – demolition time! Drained. Partly thinking “Surely that was the last of it & smooth sailing from now.” The other (more pessimistic) part is going, “All this & you haven’t even started the build.” I think it was Winston Churchill who said, “If you’re going through hell, keep going.”
Anyway, next post is demolition.